The Internet Theologian Explains The Da Vinci Code

Q: How do we know these non-canonical works are more accurate than the canonical ones?
A: Because the people who regarded them as sacred came out on the losing end.

Q: So, the fact that they were ultimately less popular and successful than the canonical gospels means they're true?
A: As Elaine Pagels explains it, yes.

Q: So, in that case, is the "real" foundational document of the U.S. government actually the Articles of Confederation?
A: Yes! I was just saying that to the President of Congress the other day.