Dear Joe,

I was wondering if you could help my friend out.She is going out with a really cute boy and she likes him a lot and he SUPOSIVELY likes her too. The thing is, today while we were getting onto the bus, I heard him talking to one of his guy friends and I heard his friend say "If you want to, go for it.USE HER!" I asked him and said" what were you talking about when we got on the bus?" He said they were talikng about basketball, so I asked his friend. He said the same thing. But if they were talking about her, they could have easily said they were talking about basketball because that is a famous quote in our school. I am worried for her and I don't won't her to be hurt.Should I beleive them or not?

I think what you're asking is if you should tell your friend about the comments that her boyfriend's friend said. My answer to that would be Yes, you should. Your friend deserves to know. You shouldn't just blurt it out, though. Explain what happened, making it clear that it was the friend, not the boyfriend, that was the one who said the "USE HER" part. It may be the case that the boyfriend is perfectly respectable, and the friend is just clueless and giving stupid advice without being asked (which is usually the case in situations such as that).

So then, after you do that, she might be wondering what to do next. If she asks, and only if she asks, you should encourage her to use him. Tell her to use him for whatever the hell she wants to. Tell her something like "If you want to, go for it, USE HIM!".

That way, she has the initiative, not the boyfriend. Which is probably just fine with him. Sooner or later, they'll break up, and your friend will probably be hurt.

The end result is, love sucks. Don't worry, you'll have plenty of chances to figure that out for yourself.


Joe's AMAZING Relationship Problem Solver Advice!


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